We always hear that in order to heal we have to release that what no longer serves us like old behavior and thought patterns, limiting beliefs, self-sabotaging behavior, trauma etc. But how do we know that we actually released any of it?
Working on ourselves is a journey. We take that what we have been taught and learned about ourselves and the world around us and gradually replace it with new insights and beliefs.
A great time to look at our beliefs and patterns is when we are being triggered by something or someone. You may remember one of my earlier posts about some triggers that came up while playing an online game with my husband.
Understanding the value of triggers is very important. Most of the time, we prefer to resent them, push them back, lock them away because we don’t want to deal with the emotions they bring with them. Yet, it is these emotions that need to be observed, embraced and accepted in order to be released.
For about two weeks after the online game incident, I kept on being triggered for different reasons. I allowed them to come to the surface, observed where they were coming from and had quite a few healing sobs in the process.
What happened a couple of days ago was profound. I felt as if I had forgotten something. I felt disoriented and not myself. I was so anxious – I hardly ever get anxious. Everything startled me. It felt as if a part of me was missing. At the same time I felt lighter. I felt naked. I literally had to check that I was wearing clothes. That’s how strange it felt.
One time I called my husband on my cell and while talking to him, I looked at my car keys in my hand and almost freaked because I did not see my cell phone. Of course I then realized that I was using it to talk to my husband at that very moment.
What had happened was, that I had released a good chunk of my past traumas, limiting beliefs and painful memories in a matter of two weeks. This caused a major shift within me. A part of me disappeared, as it should, because it was no longer needed. But since it was such a huge shift, my body, mind and spirit needed time to adjust. I needed time to settle into my new reality.
I still occasionally feel a bit beside myself, but working in the garden every day and with that grounding really helped me a lot. In a situation like this one, where positive change is happening, grounding is the best thing you can do. Go for long walks, walk barefoot in the grass, walk along the beach in the water, meditate or anything else that grounds you.
Have you ever experienced a profound energy shift? How did you experience it?